Have you noticed how difficult it's become to do just one thing at a time?

We watch television while scrolling through our phones. We eat dinner while checking messages. We might even be having a conversation with someone sitting right beside us while texting somebody else.

We're physically in the room, but how much attention are we actually giving to what's happening around us?

Modern life is busy, and most of us have numerous responsibilities to juggle. Being able to manage different things is often necessary.

But have we become so accustomed to multitasking that we're missing some of the moments that make life enjoyable?

And could trying to do everything at once be making life more stressful than it needs to be?

Why do we feel the need to multitask all the time?

Think about how many different roles we have in our lives.

We might be a wife, husband, mother, father, son, daughter, friend, employee, employer or carer. Sometimes several of those at once.

Then there's work, shopping, housework, appointments, family commitments and everything else that needs organising.

Everyone's circumstances are different, but it's easy to see why we can end up with so many things competing for our attention.

It's rather like having 25 tabs open on your computer!

One's playing music, another has a video running, several contain work you haven't finished, and you've completely forgotten why you opened half of them!

Eventually, everything starts slowing down.

Our minds can sometimes feel a little like that too.

And with phones constantly within reach, there's always seems to be another notification, email, message or social media update waiting for us.

We've become so accustomed to dividing our attention that doing just one thing can almost feel unusual.

What happens to your brain when you multitask?

Although we often think we're doing several things simultaneously, our brains frequently switch between tasks that require conscious attention.

Psychologists call this task switching.

Research carried out at University College London explored how interruptions affect computer-based tasks. The research found that interruptions can slow performance, increase errors and make it difficult to maintain concentration.

Imagine you're writing an important email.

Halfway through, your phone pings.

You read the message, send a reply, notice another notification and then return to your email.

Now you've got to remember where you were and what you were going to say next.

It might only take a few moments, but when this happens repeatedly throughout the day, those interruptions can add up.

Of course, some activities work perfectly well together. Listening to music while doing the housework is rather different from trying to concentrate on an important report while holding a conversation.

But when two activities both require our attention, continually switching between them can make things more difficult than they need to be.

Can multitasking make you feel mentally exhausted?

Have you ever reached the end of the day feeling absolutely exhausted, even though you haven't been particularly physically active?

You might have spent much of the day answering messages, making decisions, planning, remembering things and dealing with interruptions.

Your body hasn't necessarily done very much, but your mind has been busy all day.

Mental fatigue can have many causes, including prolonged concentration, stress and poor sleep. Repeated interruptions can add to the demands on our attention.

And sometimes, those mental tabs aren't even related to what we're doing.

We might be thinking about tomorrow's appointments, replaying a conversation from yesterday or worrying about something that hasn't happened yet.

It's another collection of those tabs running in the background.

I've explored this further in my blog, Why do I keep having conversations and arguments in my head?

We can't always reduce the number of things we need to do, but we may be able to reduce how many we're trying to concentrate on at the same time.

Are our phones stopping us from being fully present?

Our phones are wonderful for keeping in touch, finding information and managing everyday life.

But they can also distract us from what's happening right in front of us.

Think about a family sitting together watching television, each person scrolling through their own phone.

Or someone enjoying a meal with friends but regularly checking messages.

Perhaps a child is telling a parent about something exciting that happened at school, while the parent is trying to finish replying to a message.

Most of us have probably experienced situations like these, from one side or the other.

And the person looking at their phone may genuinely believe they're listening.

But there's a difference between hearing someone speak and giving them your full attention.

Researchers at the University of Essex investigated how mobile phones affect face-to-face conversations. Their experiments found evidence that even having a mobile phone present could reduce feelings of closeness and connection, particularly when people were discussing meaningful subjects.

That doesn't mean every phone on a table will spoil a conversation. But it does show how technology can influence our interactions in ways we may not notice.

Because when we're distracted, we can miss the little things.

A facial expression. A moment of excitement. Something someone has been looking forward to sharing.

And those little moments can mean a great deal.

Why is giving someone your full attention so important?

Giving someone your full attention can help them feel heard, understood and appreciated.

Think about a child who's bursting to tell you about their day.

A partner who wants to share something that's been bothering them.

A friend who's excited about some good news.

Or an elderly parent who simply enjoys having someone to talk to.

They may not need us to solve anything, offer advice or do something for them.

They may simply want us to listen.

Of course, there will be times when we're busy and can't give someone our immediate attention. That's part of everyday life.

But when we can, putting the phone down, looking at someone and really listening can make an enormous difference.

Giving someone your full attention, whether they're a child or an adult, can make them feel listened to, valued and important. And that is priceless.

And we benefit too, because we're actually enjoying the conversation rather than being distracted by whatever else is happening on a screen.

Why do I always feel I have to be doing something?

For some people, keeping busy has become such a familiar habit that slowing down can feel uncomfortable.

Perhaps they grew up in a household where sitting around was considered lazy.

Perhaps they learnt that being productive, helpful or constantly available was a way of gaining approval.

Or perhaps keeping occupied became a way of avoiding uncomfortable thoughts or feelings.

Our unconscious mind learns through experience and repetition, and behaviours we practise regularly can become automatic.

We might reach for our phones while waiting for the kettle to boil.

Check emails during lunch.

Or start thinking about the next job before we've finished the one we're doing.

None of these things necessarily means there's a problem.

But sometimes we're no longer making a conscious choice about where our attention goes. We're simply following familiar habits.

And if being busy has become connected with feeling useful, valued or in control, doing one thing at a time may initially feel strange.

The good news is that habits can change.

Why is it easier to relax and switch off when we're on holiday?

Think about how differently we sometimes approach life when we're on holiday.

For many people, going away means a break from the usual routine.

Fewer work emails, fewer household chores and fewer reminders of everything that needs organising.

We might sit and enjoy breakfast without rushing.

Read a book without checking our phones every few minutes.

Take a walk and enjoy the surroundings.

Or sit and have a conversation without thinking about the next job on our list.

Some of those mental tabs that are normally open throughout the day can finally be closed.

Of course, holidays aren't relaxing for everyone. Travelling with young children, caring responsibilities or simply managing a busy itinerary can bring their own challenges.

But when we do manage to disconnect from our usual demands, we often find ourselves enjoying individual moments more fully.

I've written previously about the importance of making time to disconnect from work in Why taking your annual leave matters more than you think.

And there's something else to consider.

Why do we give ourselves permission to slow down and enjoy one thing at a time on holiday, but find it so difficult to do the same at home?

We don't have to abandon our responsibilities or wait until our next holiday to enjoy some of those quieter moments.

We can begin changing how we approach everyday activities.

Can doing one thing at a time help reduce stress?

Focusing on one demanding task at a time can reduce unnecessary interruptions and the mental effort involved in switching between activities.

It doesn't mean we have to do less.

And it certainly doesn't mean ignoring the responsibilities we have.

It simply means giving our attention to what we're doing before moving on to something else, whenever that's practical.

If you're preparing dinner, you can concentrate on cooking without simultaneously checking emails and scrolling through social media.

If you're working on something important, you can give it your attention without responding to every notification as soon as it arrives.

And if you're spending time with someone, you can enjoy their company without feeling the need to keep checking your phone.

The other jobs will still be there, and you can deal with them afterwards.

For some activities, doing one thing at a time can be more efficient than constantly switching between several.

And it may also make what we're doing more enjoyable.

How can I stop multitasking and become more present in everyday life?

You don't need to completely change your routine or reorganise your entire life.

Small adjustments to how you use your attention can make a difference.

1. Notice when you're multitasking

Pay attention to how often you pick up your phone or start another activity before finishing what you're doing.

Sometimes we don't even realise we're doing it.

2. Concentrate on one task at a time

Where possible, finish what you're doing before moving on to something else.

You may find you can concentrate more easily and make fewer mistakes.

3. Write things down

If you suddenly remember something that needs doing, make a note of it rather than interrupting your current activity.

That way, the responsibility hasn't disappeared, but you don't have to keep thinking about it.

4. Give people your full attention

Put your phone aside when you're having a conversation or spending time with family and friends, wherever practical.

Enjoy being involved in what's happening around you.

5. Enjoy doing just one thing

Have a cup of tea without checking your messages.

Watch a programme without scrolling through your phone.

Go for a walk and enjoy your surroundings.

You can still get on with everything else afterwards.

And you might find those simple everyday experiences become much more enjoyable.

Can hypnotherapy help with overthinking and difficulty switching off?

Sometimes, the challenge isn't the number of things we have to do.

It's the feeling that we must always be doing something.

Perhaps there's a constant pressure to be productive, a fear of falling behind or a sense of guilt whenever we try to relax.

For some people, those patterns may be linked to anxiety, perfectionism or beliefs developed through earlier experiences.

Over time, these responses can become so familiar that they happen automatically.

Clinical hypnotherapy may help people explore unconscious patterns associated with overthinking, stress and difficulty relaxing.

By working with those underlying habits and beliefs, the aim is to develop different responses and feel more comfortable slowing down.

If you find it difficult to switch off, or feel constantly overwhelmed by everything competing for your attention, you're welcome to book a free, no-obligation 45-minute consultation to explore how hypnotherapy may help.

Book your free consultation

How can we enjoy more of life without having to do less?

Life will always involve responsibilities, commitments and things that need our attention.

And there will inevitably be times when several things need dealing with at once.

But being busy doesn't mean we have to divide our attention constantly.

We can enjoy a meal without checking our phones.

Have a proper conversation without being distracted by messages.

Concentrate on one job before starting another.

And allow ourselves moments of calm without feeling we should be doing something else at the same time.

We may still have exactly the same number of things on our to-do lists.

But by approaching them one at a time, we can sometimes make everyday life feel less stressful.

And enjoy more of what's happening around us in the process.

After all, life isn't just about everything we need to get done.

It's also about the people we spend time with, the conversations we share and the moments we enjoy along the way.

Frequently asked questions about multitasking and being present

Is multitasking bad for your brain?

Multitasking isn't necessarily harmful, but repeatedly switching between activities that require concentration can reduce efficiency, increase mistakes and demand additional mental effort. Some simple activities can be combined comfortably, while more demanding tasks often benefit from focused attention.

Why do I feel mentally exhausted when I haven't done much physically?

Mental exhaustion can develop from prolonged concentration, decision-making, worrying and repeatedly switching between tasks. Your mind may have been working hard even when your body hasn't been particularly active.

Does doing one thing at a time reduce stress?

For some people, focusing on one demanding activity at a time can reduce mental overload and make tasks feel more manageable. It can also reduce interruptions associated with constantly switching between activities.

Why do I struggle to put my phone down?

Checking your phone can become an automatic habit through repetition, notifications and the expectation of new information. Recognising when you're reaching for your phone without a particular reason can help you develop more conscious habits.

Why do I feel guilty when I'm not being productive?

Feeling guilty about resting can sometimes be associated with learnt beliefs about achievement, responsibility or self-worth. If being constantly busy has become a familiar pattern, allowing yourself time to relax may initially feel uncomfortable.

Why do I find it easier to switch off on holiday?

Holidays often provide a break from everyday routines and work-related demands. This can create more opportunities to disconnect mentally and recover from ongoing pressures.

How can I be more present with my family and friends?

Try giving conversations and shared activities your full attention whenever possible. Putting your phone aside, listening without distractions and concentrating on the people around you can make everyday interactions more meaningful.

Can hypnotherapy help with an overactive mind and overthinking?

Hypnotherapy may help some people explore unconscious habits and beliefs associated with anxiety, overthinking and difficulty relaxing. It can form part of an approach to developing calmer responses to everyday situations.

UK research referenced in this article

University College London (2019)

Borghouts, J. W. Task, interrupted: understanding the effect of time costs on task interruptions during data entry.

This research investigated the effects of interruptions on concentration, task performance and errors.

Read the UCL research

University of Essex (2013)

Przybylski, A. K. and Weinstein, N. Can you connect with me now? How the presence of mobile communication technology influences face-to-face conversation quality.

Published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, this research investigated the effect of mobile phone presence on interpersonal closeness and conversation quality.

Read the University of Essex research

P.S. The next time you find yourself doing three things at once, try concentrating on just one of them. You might discover that slowing down a little makes the whole experience more enjoyable.

If anxiety, overthinking or feeling constantly under pressure is affecting your everyday life, you're welcome to explore how hypnotherapy may help.

Book your free 45-minute no obligation consultation here

Lesley Ford

Award-winning Clinical Hypnotherapist

Phoenix Hypnotherapy, Cheltenham, Gloucestershire

Specialising in anxiety, trauma and confidence, with online sessions available across the UK.

November 13th 2026